April 20, 2004

Stanger on a Train

Check out what Beth found in the Missed Connections section of Craig's List:

Girl With Glasses Who Rides The N from Ditmars To The 1 to Houston

I've been seeing you every morning for the past 8 months. You have black collar-legnth hair, a cute nose and wear squarish black rimmed specs. Sometimes you carry a bag with a picture of a robot on it. Although, you're cute in the extreme, I have a girlfreind and I'm not looking for romance. You just seem like someone it'd be interesting to know. I'm usually in jeans, a t-shirt and an open plaid flannel.

I have always dreamed of finding myself in the missed connections listings! I know exactly who the creepy man is that wrote this and yes, I'm slightly disturbed by the stalkerly quality of the posting, but also flattered.

Once again it brings me back to the topic of plastic surgery. I have long believed that a person's features are a portion of what defines them and to mess with them is just straight up wrong. To now know that a stranger has been admiring my "cute nose" every day on the subway confirms this belief 100%. What if I had gotten the bump on my nose shaved down in ninth grade? I would look like everyother nose-jobbed twit on television and I never would have found myself on the Missed Connections board.

It was so obvious that the only thing those Swan contestants needed was a little eye make-up and some self confindence. Maybe if someone got them robot bags they would realize that being attractive has nothing to do with looking like Amanda Byram.

The thing that makes me a thousand times sadder than The Swan is the current state of Meg Ryan's mouth. Her smile was the greatest. Her smile had me convinced that she was the happiest most genuine celebrity alive. Now she looks like The Joker. Meg why, oh why did you do it? We would have accepted you with mouth wrikles, I swear!

Posted by on April 20, 2004 9:55 PM

One important thing I must point out is that no one could ever look like Amanda Byram; she's too beautiful.

Posted by: Frank on April 21, 2004 4:55 PM

isnt it strange that the man thought you had black hair? you are a lucky lady though. missed connections. its like reading some strangers thoughts on those split seconds that occur every moment.

Posted by: Lea on April 22, 2004 1:24 AM

you have a bag with a robot on it?

Posted by: bmad on April 22, 2004 7:36 PM

Yes I have a bag with robots. Trust me, it's me ok?

Posted by: The Lady on April 23, 2004 10:16 PM

dear girl with glasses,
i bared my heart to you on the internet, and you, ironically broke it in two by the same means. Tomorrow I'll sit in a different car.

Posted by: creepy man on April 29, 2004 6:30 PM
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