December 30, 2003

I swear someone is out to get me!

This morning I got a prank call at 6am. My phone said Withheld Number, like it does when my mom calls. I figured it might be important so I picked up and gave a weary hello. It was a stange man's voice he was sort of stumbling over his words in a confused way--wrong number I thought and hung up. He called back and I let it ring.

An hour and a half later, when my alarm went off, I listened to the message. It was some redneck who thought he was really fucking funny. He sounded all confused and worried saying, "Shaniqua, is that you? I think that was you who just picked up. Listen I don't know, I don't know how anyone could forget their own child. I found Donelle in my car this morning. He'd been in there since last night."

This freaked me out a little because I was still half asleep, however I had a feeling that it was a prank call. He went on,

"Now don't worry, he's just fine. He was real hungry, yeah he ate my burberry scarf that I had in the seat back there..."

Hearing this I got confused, was he talking about a dog?

"He seems to be holding it down alright though, Oh wait no! Now I've got a burberry couch, he just puked it up. But don't worry, I gave him a bottle of New Castle to quiet him down, yeah, and he liked that alright. Then I gave him some Hennesey..." It went on, it was like a 20 minute monologue. A really shitty one.

When I came home tonight I sat down to eat some tempeh salad I 'd made this weekend. I'd eaten half of it when I first made it and it was good. Tonight I was sitting there munching away, talking to Janine when we both heard a loud crack. She thought I'd broke my tooth. I felt a large hard cold thing in my mouth that was about the size of a tooth, although I knew I hadn't lost one. I spit it out and discovered that it was a big ole' piece of glass. I was shocked. We searched through the rest of the salad and found another piece. I don't no where it came from. "I feel like some one is out to get me," I said to Janine and then we both looked at each other and whispered "Barton". He's our evil reclusive neighbor and arch nemesis. We call him Barton Fink, like the Coen brother's movie. I think Barton might be trying to kill me.

Posted by on December 30, 2003 10:19 PM

lady, i had a strange message on my machine this morning as well. i couldn't understand most of it, because of interference, but it was very intriguing. and at the end the person said, "i just want to see how you're doing. but maybe it's not my business." weird! who could it be?

no glass in my food yet, though.

happy new year,

Posted by: bmad on December 31, 2003 12:18 PM

i recieved a prank call at work. at fist they asked abouta movie. but they were using a prominent fake retarded voice. then they asked if i named things after myself. i said yes i name pets after myself. they asked if i named my clothes after myself. i said no just ponies, you know small horses. i told them my name was sabrina. then they asked if was sabrina bathman. i said no. they said oh well she works with you. there is a girl at my work with a similar name. but the voice was not like anyone i work with. i think my boss had a friend call. even if she did deny it.

Posted by: buckle fb 123 on January 1, 2004 3:08 PM
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